Song of a Broken Heart

It breaks you HEART when people you know become people you knew;

When you can walk right past someone as if they were never a HUGE part of your life...

Your heart breaks and your head aches,

And you feel like an ass for wanting them to feel the same way you do...

It sucks to know that person is going to be fine without you,

But you know you will never be the same without them...

You used to be able to talk for hours on the phone,

And now you can't even look at each other in the damn eye...

It completely breaks your heart to know good things change

even though you don't want them to...

What do you do when you already did everything,

When you were so damn close to perfection, but it still wasn't enough...

How are you supposed to react when he or she acts like nothing ever happened,

When he or she treats you like if you were friends...

What do you do when you don't wanna be friends

Because it reminds you of what you used to be, more...

Why do you become the asshole for wanting him/her to feel what you feel,

To feel just as pathetic, anxious, and confused as you do...

It hurts to know you wait around all day for a text or call or even an e-mail,

HOPING that they regret ending it and beg for another chance...

And it kills you to know that if they did want to comeback,

No matter how pathetic or how stupid you feel you will take them back in a heartbeat...

And the worst feeling of all is not knowing what you did to make them leave...

You spend all day staring at the ceiling replaying every moment of your time together,

Trying to catch whatever it was you "did" even when you know it's not your fault...

And when you do this three or four times and you get to the point where you can't think anymore,

You pick up the phone to call him/her but know that you'll just look pathetic so you don't call...

Instead you lay back down, bury your face in your pillow,

And SCREAM your heart OUT!!!

Tears start to run down your face,

You think of who to call to make you feel better,

But you know the only person who can make you laugh is him/her,

So you cry, you cry so hard until it hurts, until you can't breath until you can't see until you can't think...

And after all this you somehow still find the strength to throw on that fake smile,

Stand in front of everyone and be able to say, "I'm Okay"...

And no one even takes a second look, cuz no one notices

And you think you have fooled everyone...

But in your heart you know the truth,

That you lost someone very special...

But now that person is just a hope, a dream, a memory.

Cuz know he/she is gone;

And there was nothing, absolutely nothing you could have done to stop it.

This is the lost serenade of a weeping soul...

The memory of someone special...

The Sorrow of our conflicted minds...

This is the song of a broken heart...

By  luckye1216 :
Youtube link : http://www.youtube.com/user/luckye1216
Link to this poetry : http://www.youtube.com/user/luckye1216?feature=watch 

101+ Romantic Things To Do With Your Partner

FYI: I agree with some of them. Some of them are a little unrealistic. But you already know all that  well I hope so anyway :).

1. Watch the sunset together.

2. Take showers together.

3. Back rubs/massages.

4. Listen to classical music and cuddle in the dark or with blacklight.

5. French Kiss.

6. Hold your wife with hands inside the back of her shirt.

7. Whisper to each other.

8. Cook for each other.

9. Skinny dip (discreetly).

10. Make out in the rain.

11. Dress each other.

12. Undress each other.

13. Kiss every part of your wife’s body.

14. Hold hands.

15. Sleep together. (Actually sleep with each other…not sex)

16. One word…Foreplay.

17. Sit and talk.

18. Buy gifts for each other.

19. Roses.

20. Wear your lifemate’s favorite cologne/perfume every time you’re together.

21. Wear your husband’s clothes.

22. Find a nice secluded place to lie and watch the stars.

23. Incense/candles/oils/blacklights and music make for great cuddling/sex.

24. Kiss at every chance you get.

25. Don’t wear underwear and let them find out.

26. Kinky is bad…Blindfolds are good.

27. Lightly kiss their collarbone and their jawbone just below the ear, then whisper “I love you”.

28. Bubble baths.

29. Go for a long walk down the beach at midnight.

30. Make love.

31. Write poetry for each other.

32. Kiss and smell your wife’s hair.

33. Hugs are the universal medicine.

34. Say “I love you”, only when you mean it and make sure they know you mean it.

35. Give random gifts of flowers/candy/poetry, etc.

36. Tell your wife that she’s the only girl you ever want. Don’t lie.

37. Spend every second possible together.

38. Tell your wife that she doesn’t have to do anything she doesn’t want to. And mean it.

39. Look into each other’s eyes.

40. Very lightly push up your wife’s chin, look into her eyes, tell her you love her, and kiss her lightly.

41. Talk to each other using only body language and your eyes.

42. When in public, flirt with each other.

43. Walk behind your wife and put your hands in her front pockets.

44. Put love notes in your lifemate’s pockets when they aren’t looking.

45. Clothes are no fun.

46. Buy your wife a ring.

47. Keep something special of your wife’s/your husband’s somewhere where you see it everyday.

48. Sing to each other.

49. Read to each other.

50. PDA = Public Displays of Affection.

51. Take advantage of any time alone together.

52. Tell your wife about how you answered every question in math with her name. (Assuming you’re continuing your education).

53. Draw. (If you can.)

54. Let your wife sit on your lap.

55. Go hiking and camp out together in the woods or on a mountain.

56. Lips were made for kissing. So were eyes, and fingers, and cheeks, and collarbones, and hands, and ears.

57. Kiss your wife’s stomach.

58. Always hold your wife around her hips/sides.

59. Husbands like half-shirts.

60. Take your wife to dinner and do the dinner for two deal.

61. Spaghetti…(Ever see Lady and the Tramp?)

62. Hold your wife’s hand, stare into her eyes, kiss her hand and then put it over your heart.

63. Unless you can feel their heart beating, you aren’t close enough.

64. Dance together.

65. Sit in front of a roaring fire and make out/make love.

66. Tell your lifemate you love the way they look right after they’ve fallen asleep, with their head in your lap.

67. Carry your wife to bed.

68. Waterbeds are fun.

69. You figure it out.

70. Do cute things like write “I love you” in a note so that they have to look in the mirror to read it.

71. Break every one of your ‘safe’ relationship rules for your lifemate.

72. Make excuses to call your lifemate repeatedly in one day.

73. Even if you are really busy doing something, go out of your way to call and say “I love you”.

74. Call from your business trip to tell your lifemate you were thing about them.

75. Remember your dreams and tell your lifemate about them.

76. Drive home from work just to see your lifemate, before turning around and going back to a business meeting in the evening.

77. Sit in your car in the driveway, honk, then blow your lifemate a kiss as you leave for work.

78. Tell each other your most sacred secrets/fears.

79. Share your deepest convictions.

80. Be Prince/Princess Charming to your lifemate’s parents.

81. Act out mutual fantasies together. (Not necessarily sexual)

82. Brush your wife’s hair out of her face for her.

83. Stay up all night to think of 101 ways to be sweet to your lifemate.

84. Hang out with your lifemate’s friends, too.

85. Learn to listen.

86. Take your wife to see a romantic movie and remember the parts she liked.

87. Cuddle together under a full moon on a clear night.

88. Learn from each other and don’t make the same mistakes twice.

89. Everyone deserves a second chance.

90. Describe the joy you feel just to be with your lifemate.

91. Make sacrifices for each other.

92. Really love each other.

93. Write a fictional story about how you met/fell in love, etc. and give it to your lifemate.

94. Let there never be a second during any given day that you aren’t thinking about them, and make sure they know it.

95. Hot tubs are great.

96. Learn to say sweet things in foreign languages, including sign language.

97. Dedicate songs to them on the radio.

98. Fall asleep on the phone with each other.

99. Sleep naked together.

100. Stand up for your lifemate when someone says unkind things about them.

101. Never forget the kiss goodnight. And always remember to say, “Sweet dreams.”

102. Groom your spouse. Ask to brush your wife’s hair when she gets out of the shower. Shave your husband’s face.

103. A Short Story – You know the guys that go around in restaurants and bars with the basket of roses selling them? My husband sought him out one evening before coming home from work, bought the entire basket of roses, and left them on my doorstep, then called me and told me to go to the front door! That was so romantic!

104. Be waiting at your mates car when they get off work, out of the beauty salon, get done grocery shopping…be creative!

105. Buy 11 real roses and one fake one…leave a note that says I’ll love you until the last rose dies… -Mark Ansley

106. Kiss your mate on their forehead.

107. While your lifemate is out. Put a bag of Hershey hugs on the door knob. Put rose peddles mixed with Hershey kisses on the floor leading to the bathroom with lights off. Candles for your light lined up all the way to the bathroom also. Two dozen roses lined all over the bathtub. With a card in plain view. And on the card write ” Now that I have hugged u before u walked in the door, kissed the ground that you walk on, and showered you with roses. Will you be mine 4-ever.” 

why am i so mad

why am i so mad,
why does it still hurt so bad,
how can i be so angry and hurt at the same time,
how come i cant have your heart but you still have mine,
when will the pain stop when will i no longer care,
when am i gonna wake up and realize youll never again be there,
when will i stop hurting myself thinking about you,
dreaming these dreams that will never come true,
i guess your wondering what im talking about right,
this rambling and ranting over some stupid guy,
see there was a time when i was getting married,
and this weight on my shoulders he once carried,
everything was great, then three days before our wedding,
i found out i was pregnant and he said he wasnt ready,
he said to get an abortion or he would call the wedding off,
so i lifted my head and thought "hell thats your loss"
that was the last time i saw him to this very day,
he threatened my baby and i moved away,
now im engaged to be married again,
ironically the guy used to be his best friend,
its been three years, now my daughter is two,
you stilldont acknowledge her even though shes the spitting image of you,
i try to carry on and just forget you were ever in my life,
let you just carry on and be happy with your new wife,
pretend that i dont care but i do,
why the hell cant i just forget about you,
you cant hurt me if i dont let you get the chance,
you said no one would ever love me, they 'd just want in my pants,
why am i so angry it just gives you some ground,
your still hurting me inside and your not even around,
how can i be so stupid, to even think of you,
why do i still wonder what you do,
i feel so dumb i check your myspace page all the time,
and hope you read the stuff about my daughter on mine,
but i bet you dont even take the time of day,
i bet you probably dont care anyway
you know what hurts the most is today i looked at your page,
and saw that you and your new wife have a new baby on the way,
i wonder if you'll run from her the way you did with me,
run like some coward, like we have the prego disease,
i want to let go of this anger let go of this rage,
i wish you'd just delete your stupid myspace page,
congratulations dad better get on some running shoes,
make a fast getaway, cause thats what deadbeat dads do,
leave her pregnant and lonely the way you did me,
a single mom in college with two jobs and a new baby,
no child support because i didnt need your money,
my days were dark and cloudy and yours were nice and sunny,
you missed so much with her, and so i pity you,
and all along i thought you were my dream come true,
til the day i met my daughter and you werent there with me,
i thought about how sad and pitiful your life must be,
she's never seen your face and i pray she never will,
i have so many thoughts no words can express what i feel,
so go about your day and dont let us cross your mind,
cause when you get tired of running, we wont be at the finish line.

Metaphors for a Whore

My eyes are closed and I see:

There are hues of red. The branches break. I can almost taste the wind again and the way it bounced off the floor of that old field.

Smiles filled the air like balloons at a carnival, but with less happiness. There was more in the broken hymns than in the stories of Sunday school. I've been to Saturday school and liked it more. I guess it's just a difference in opinions and hopes.

Maybe it's a difference in responsibility.


Summer came like Winter's blade:

Through the rhythmic beating of fists on Formica counters came the blisters of the song. Though, no one seemed to kiss the blade of Winter like the embrace of Summer. For some, there was a bout of peace.

We just wondered what peace was about.

So I wrote a piece, but forgot what it was for.

What's it all about?


Now we find the truth:

It's hidden beneath old memories.
There's not really anything of importance.
This is all just dredged up bull****.
If you want I'll sing you to sleep,
But I'll sing it in a language you have yet to understand:
Love.


Opened eyes see better anyway:

And now it's all becoming real again. I was passing glances at the past. I didn't see anything new, but reveled in the old. I kissed you again in those memories. They haunt me. I must have breathed you in too deep. Did you know that I can love you in Spanish, too? Te amo.

I'm starting to lose sight of the meaning of these words. Too many prepositions and conjunctions. Too many things I forgot I knew.


I wish I could forget I knew you:

But I drag your number through my phone twice a day. It makes me feel creepy, but you make me feel whole. I think I'd be better off with you if I used semicolons and made semi-smart remarks.


So here it goes:

I'm dragging this heavy load through fields of broken dignity, clutching the melodies of songs we sang in Georgia (or about Georgia). Your omnipresent image plagues the few dark spaces of my brain; you're no longer welcome here, or anywhere.


How's this for goodbye:

Goodbye?

I think it's better said, "Come home." I use that line too much.

You're already tired of me and so am I. I'm just tired of our bull****. Hell, I'm tired of loving you. Let me let go. Disappear.


How's this for goodbye:

Hello.
I wish this were the movies.
I could have you from that word.
God knows that's what I wish.


I'm gonna leave your memory behind because it feels like dirty quarters and broken glass. I'm scared of getting dirt inside my cuts. You're already a bad enough infection; it's no secret that you spread.

I'll cut you out completely, dirty whore.

Will you listen?

if I told you I loved you
would you stand and stare?
would you take me into your warm arms
and whisper that you cared?
darlin' you're the light in the winter skies
my hope in these dark days as summer dies
you were the one who taught me to dance through life
who told me to put away the knife and listen
to our soul's soaring melodies
we're broken but we have each other
will you listen please
if I told you I loved you
would you see me with those oceanic eyes?
see the real me and look past my disguise?
I wish I could dance with you the whole night through
hurt you to see you cry the tears kept so long inside
and finally know the truth
play my song again and I'll kiss you in the rain
taste your tears and wash away the pain
if I told you I loved you
would you let me hold you as we fall asleep?
if you want it boy, my heart's yours to keep.

Carpe Diem

Suddenly the sky is falling
Everything's crashing down
There's no strength left in me to fight
I let the peaces fall to the ground

I've given up on the world
Why waste the effort?
All of it's meaningless
None of it's real

I can't cope
And I don't want to
Not like this
Not without you

You Really Suck

No words to say no thoughts to think
Just tears to cry and the feeling of letting my heart sink
Thanks for turning my heart of gold
Into an empty hole, blank, and cold
I really hate you, I don't know what to say
I just don't know if I can go through like this every day
Faking a smile and a feeling of cheer
When really I don't know why I'm even here
You keep bringing me up to crush me down
While turning my smile into a frown
I think I fell in love with you just by your luck
Because truthfully, you really suck

makes me wonder

I guess it’s you that I got used to
Now you’re not here and everything I do reminds me of you
I believed in you, I’ve hoped and I’ve cried for you
Now it’s just you without me and me without you
If only you were honest
If only ……then you would see
What I am about and what we could have been
But I guess it’s over now, when it even haven’t started yet
It makes me wonder what we were and what we could have been.

Final Thoughts

I lost.

It wasn't a game. There were no teams. This was personal. It was. Then he came back and slid his hands into your mind. You spit up life and lessons. Both your eyes bore holes into his ghost as you silently kissed my hand. Something in the way you leaned said your heart was breaking free. I couldn't hold on. I'm sorry.

Some say to win you have to lose. I believe it. I've lived it.

Your fingers once ripped their way into mine. I got scared. I'm not scared to admit it, but, God, was I scared to feel it. My knees trembled in the wake of what I knew was to come. I should have listened to the voice in my head. Keep her safe, keep her warm, keep her friend. I was not as strong as I appeared. I was nothing. I was scared.

Find me.

Those sheets we lay beneath lay stained when our bodies rose. Every night I lay there in my grave. The smell of dignity rose sweet from the places where it lay, forgotten. The only thing that kept it there was regret. Your eyes grew foggy at the sight of me and I grew weary of your knives. I felt the daggers of your tongue as they slid violently inside.

I think it's best we don't talk. There's nothing left to be said.

Broken

I have so much to say
But nothing can come out
I have to hide who I am
Hide what I want to scream out loud

I hate myself
Who I am inside
But I fake a smile
To my friends I have to hide

I hold on another day
Holding on for love
Someone please rescue me
I need that girl that I’ve been dreaming of

You hurt me so much
It’s time to move on
But I can’t help but to think
That we still belong

Every part of me is dying
Why can’t you see
This bleeding soul before you
This hurt guy is me

These secrets of me
Lies that are buried deep
Cut myself just to bleed
You’re haunting my every dream

I wish someone
Would come into my life
Save me from hell
And stay by my side

I'm Always Here

I walk quietly behind you
Led by a single candle light
As your path becomes darker
My candle will become bright

Your road ahead may be glorious
With no reason to turn around
But come the first sign of rain
I will always be easily found

Sometimes the road may narrow
With hills impossible to climb
My hands will be there for you
With needed force from behind

There are obstacles that lay ahead
May cause you to stumble and fall
I'll always be there to lift you up
And hold you until you stand tall

Not chosen to walk beside you
I will gladly assume my place
For I will always love you
With these tears on my face

My Pain

I saw a pair walking around
I drowned myself, it’s easy now
But a part of me is on the ground
If there’s a way, please tell me how

The door is closed and I’m restrained
I’m pale inside, you made me faint
The soul is cursed and so am I
The eyes were wet but now are dry

I know this floor
I know this place
It’s like a war
That I can’t face

I feared that friction
I feared that moment
It’s just a second
It’s just a motion

I broke my wing
I broke my act
You made your thing
You made that pact

To keep this way
Or simply die
You went away
But I can’t cry

I saw the past
I saw your face
You chose a path
That I can’t chase

You have your time
You have your place
You’re an Angel
Give me your grace

You chose him
You left me there
You went your way
You gave me despair

And now I’m here
I’m left alone
What was a heart
Is now a stone

Chasing the Dragon

My dreams rest on foil with a match underneath.
I light them on fire and breathe in relief;
it seeps in my lungs and my veins start to seethe
for just seconds. Then suddenly

I’m weightless,

floating inches above my mattress
simultaneously tasting unconsciousness and
wondrous actuality.

But in reality, I’m lost
somewhere in between the bad and the badder,
trippin’ through Wonderland ‘cept there ain’t no Mad Hatter,
no blondie named Alice, no cat to grin at her.
The moon’s shining bright but I got no ladder
and being glued to this earth just makes me sadder
when I’m tryin’ to thieve haloes
from the night.

...that **** ain't right.

I kinda want to wander up yonder
‘cause I’m fonder of the sky and
I like to get high all the time,

but my mind won’t let go of the memories
I don’t quite wish to remember, like
skylark tunes and Mylar balloons,
late night headaches and early morning cartoons,
soaking in the heat of late summer afternoons
while praying I’d never be grounded.

(I kinda want to wander…)

They make me feel brand new,

unbroken,

like I never started smoking my sanity.
It’s an unnerving feeling that paints me in vanity blues,
cleaves me in two, then melts my heart into puddles of bruised
infatuation.

(…I’m fonder of the sky…)

I should quit this and
spit out my discontent,
but the bitter kiss of my pent-up anger
angles the match and lights all my dreams on fire.

(…I like to get high all the time.)

Written in blood

"Where can all the hearts go
when love leaves them high and dry?
I have attempted to cut free the pain
and all that I have received
is more yet again.
In this I differ to my lost love,
she moved on
with another to hold her,
I stayed here alone
too afraid to follow
her example
in case the truth was harder to swallow
and the bitternes of the pill
that you only taste
at the final rattle
of a once full bottle,
showed my strength of character
as the only thing left wanting...
me."

The love may have been true
but so too was the end,
so either stand up for yourself
or let reality bend,
with distortive cocktails
of regret and pithy self hate
and the bemoaning to all
that you have decided your fate,
and the drops that you spill
from a fresh opened wound,
makes all that angst you 'must' cling to
somehow a more effective appeal
then the search for closure
and the return of your belief;
Why not find a better path to victory
than just admit self defeat?

Scarlet Letter to No One

There's a hush in the bedroom. The bed lies in ruins.
Sheets litter that once nice floor.
Whispers touch the walls like love from a ghost.
There's only one thing missing.

At night the lights go dim. People tend to shiver.
Some of them cry.
In the morning, people wake. Some feel.
Others, others just wish they could.

When they stand up their covers hit the ground.
Most times, you see who they are.
They stand bare, letting their eyes adjust.
Morning makes the most of them.

There are times when their eyes never close.
Maybe they're afraid of the dark,
I'm more afraid of morning.
Every day starts with a wish. Some end in dreams.

I've been watching as the world turns.
Maybe if it turned faster
I could turn away from you.
I know I've written you this poem before.

Clothes stack themselves to Heaven,
But lately they've missed the point.
They're climbing into space
And all the spaces nothing occupies.

If this whole poem were a metaphor, who'd know?
It's not, but the thought counts just as much.
There's something nice in honesty.
Honestly, I miss you. That'd sound better in a song.

I wonder if anyone else stays up at night
Just waiting to hear the door.
Hoping someone that they once held close
Would come wading through the clothes?

We all have dirty laundry and skeletons in the closet.
When I feel brave, I lay mine down as words,
Writing my scarlet letter to no one
In hopes that someone reads.

If you're reading this then I hope you know I'm sorry.
My room is still a mess, so am I.
Don't worry, dear, this all adds up the same.
It's just another poem on another night
When I'm wishing I could dream.

I Write To Push Away The Tears.

I write to push away the tears;
Or rather cry them onto the paper.
I sing to remind me;
Of what the song truly means.
I dance to numb the pain;
And to help void my reaction.
I cry to remind myself I care;
And because the pain is too much to keep inside.
I walk to be with nature;
And to imagine im not alone.
I slice to release the pain;
It builds up to where I cannot take it.
I listen to sad songs;
Because I do not feel I want to be cheery.
I write to push away the tears;
I repeat to deepen the meaning.

Shattered Heart

You tossed me like a ragdoll
Treated me like trash
You said you always loved me
But now our love live's clash
I thought you were my soulmate
We were perfect for each other
But then you left me in the dark
And winded up with another
I can't believe you cheated
I thought our love was true
But now you're showing your real colors
I should have taken a clue
Well I guess this is the end
For us to split apart
You wind up with another girl
And I'm left with a shattered heart

Tears Behind My Eyes

When you look into my eyes they may seem to be empty,
My eyes are full of tears, although you don't see any.

So many times my heart has been filled with pain,
And deep behind my eyes are pockets of tears that are ready to fall like rain.

I know at times I may appear to be tough,
but sometimes to bear the pain and heartache can be too much.

Sometimes I try and hide the tears that I cried just last night,
Tears that soaked my pillow wet long past mornings first light.

I know how it feels to be pushed away by someone you love,
I'm not afraid to admit my tears because I know that there's a far greater love, one that comes from above.

Happiness too will be mine, so until then I'll keep my my head up and eyes towards the skies,
And never allowing anyone to see the tears hidden behind my eyes.

Knuckles

pale face crumbles as it hits your shoulder,
a chalky landslide of porcelain features
smash with the force of breaking bones
into my fragile heart.

Spider kissing your neck sneers
as blind as the rest, your blue eyes,
and the dagger in your throat sticks
like the words choked in my own.

Hold fast.
Herons fly straight in the evening sky,
never looking back to witness
the inevitable death of the sun.

And when the moon moths appear,
your only down fall will be
that your heart's not yet inked in my
woodland.

The Journey..

This path,
Wasn't meant to be touched... The bitterness placed its hands upon it..
And this place we left behind contains a recollection of the deep explorations and admirations,
Never once I would of thought I'd have...
I still feel the heat of the burning candle between you and I..
Do you still feel it? That heat.. I call sweet sorrow..

The burning flame..
I truly wish to never be blown away,
A soothing touch will put away the misery..
Sorrow may be eternal,
Especially if true feelings aren't exposed...

Maybe

I just can’t let you go
I just want to let you know
That every night I think about you
Thinking about how our dreams never came true

I thought we meant to be
But I was just too blind to see
All the mistakes that made me
I’ve been making them, I was just too weak

Down on my knees once more
Never would I do this before
It’s supposed to be, me holding a ring
In a silver box, hoping love is what it’ll bring

But you’re gone, never to come back
Never to smile again, my faith you lacked
I just didn’t deserve you baby
And I could have stopped it, maybe

If only I tried harder, to be a better man
Instead I acted like a freak, taking every heart I can
Now I cry, doesn’t matter if I learned my mistake
Because it won’t bring you back, it won’t for heart’s sake

Drowning, in the rain, in our special place
Always came home for you, now I live in empty space
No “hello I missed you, I really love you”
I can never say it, say those three words without you

I see the ring in that silver box, it’s still here
Looking at me, saying how it should be on you and not there
How I could be saying your name all the time
With our children we always had in our minds

But you’re gone, never to come back
Never to smile again, my faith you lacked
I just didn’t deserve you baby
And I could have stopped it, maybe

If I could go back in time, no it won’t happen
Fate won’t give me that chance again
I try to call you more than once a time
But then you treat it like I committed a crime

Sitting here in my lonely chair
Under the rain still, thinking how life is still unfair
Not going into a home without you
Because it’s never home without you, it’s true

Even when I see you once more
You’re never going to love me like before
I screwed up what could be perfect
I lost you and I deserved it

But you’re gone, never to come back
Never to smile again, my faith you lacked
I just didn’t deserve you baby
And I could have stopped it, maybe

The Daily Routine

wake up in the morning.
and everything is ok for a moment,
then i realize, there will be no
good morning kiss, no morning
greeting at all from you, my love.
so i cry myself out of bed, and
slowly wipe away my tears
while getting ready for the day.
and as the day progresses,
i am distracted by the classes,
by the people i see and places i have to go.
so to everyone out there, they dont even
know that i had a rough morning.
the day goes by like normal. only
thing that is really different is
the lack of you in it. and when
i lay down at night, ready for sleep.
i feel that lack the most, and it pulls
at my heart, keeping me awake till
i cant possibly stay awake any longer.
falling asleep on my freshly tear
stained pillow. just to wake up
the next morning, and do it all again.
over and over and over. my life
seems to be on repeat, unable
to move forward without you.

Only One

It only takes one smile to hide a million tears,

It only takes one "I'm fine" to hide all your fears.

Only one laugh to hide all your cries,

And only one giggle to hide all the lies.

One sigh to take away all of the pain,

One push to drive you insane.

It takes one yell to break you,

It takes one word to make nothing seem true.

But all of this you must hide.

You must not let anyone know you have lied.

Because it should only take one,

For you to say " I'm just...done".

Prison

Cast my thoughts across the land
Watch me ebb slowly from the sand
Wring me dry, hang me up
Isn't my love big enough?

Sleep with tears upon your cheeks
Brush me from the torrid weeks
That I left you, all alone
Bar me from your empty home

Fling a fishing net off-shore
Pull me in, shut the door
Satisfy your salty hands
Wrap me up in iron bands

Paint pictures of a scarlet love
Watch the world from high above
Spinning in your holy spire
Leave me in my dirty mire

Leonard Cohen had it right:
Love is a grey fading light
Even with all my hateful might
I'll never escape your bright night

The Stars Have More Heart Than You Ever Could

Once upon a time
a wax moon and paper-mâché stars were my life.
The night sky became an art project
from my fourth grade days
when I was one year away from being another top dog on the playground.
I was only nine years old but at that age
I found pleasure in the simple things,
like the happiness that sunshine brings
or vaulting off the swing set and praying I would hit the sand
and stick my landing.

My life back then was so demanding,
making sure I was always handing in my homework,
climbing trees with my friends then checking
to make sure that my clothes weren’t ripped
because if they were my mother would be pissed
and she’d use it as an excuse to get me more.

When I was in the fourth grade I hated shopping.
I was always too busy popping bubbles in midair and
stomping through puddles to even care if my clothes fit right
or if I had holes in the knees of my jeans and
“Please, Mom. Can’t we do this next week?
I’m supposed to go to Jamie’s house
to play hide-and-go-seek.
All the other kids are gonna be there,
and I wanna go too. Besides,
I’m the best hider in the group.”

Naturally, she wouldn’t listen and I’d end up missin’ out.
Guess she just didn’t understand what was so important
about fitting in with a group of grade school kids
who were as fickle as a group of grade school kids could be.

Eventually, the flow of our friendship trickled into
the end of an era
and we parted ways because I didn’t have the beauty or the brains,
the money or the schoolyard fame and
they weren’t okay with having me around.
So while they were flying high and beating people down,
I was somewhere off to the side with my eyes to the ground.

That was how the pale moon found me.

But now, it’s waning
and the stars are waving goodbye,
they’re fading and losing their light
and suddenly,
my night sky doesn’t seem so pretty.
It’s a pity
‘cause I’ve always felt that the stars were my friends.
They just get me, you know?
They’ve been with me since the day I was born
and they never cared if my clothes were torn;
they have never stolen hours from me and
they don’t give a **** about my lack of popularity.

That, in all honesty, is a rarity these days and
it kills me to know it’s just slipping away.

So when I’m alone or I’m lonely,
feeling like I’m the only one with nothing to say,
I look back on my grade school days and
my eyes gaze on a little wax moon and
stars made of paper-mâché

and in that moment,
everything seems okay.

Exeunt

Whispered smoke
fills lungs short of breath,
the words still warm,
a byproduct
of the fire within
now withheld.

Time was,
those falling cinders
of fluttering eyelashes
would scar my breast
where you would rest
a head too weary
to look away
from the destination
our lives were bound.

Now my world cools,
and the flames
no longer lick
limbs that fuel
covetous concepts.

All is darker
than this evening
of changing light,
shading fears
that await the fall
of consuming shadows,
and tomorrows debt
left forfeit,
for yesterdays pain.

Cold

Look back at all the things you have done.
All of the cold memories that haunt you.
As you sit alone, The cold comes to assist.
The cold takes a nice spot beside you in your time of need.
It is not your first thought as to why it's there.
But the cold knows your feelings are there.

You remain in your spot of misery,
You stand there with no clarity,
The cold has never left your side,
And after a brief time,
The tree begins to feel your pain in its side.

All you have is being lonely and misery,
It's the loneliest day of your life.
The smiles of the stars are blocked by your depression,
The cold remains at your side,
It understands all of your pain,
The tree remembers your pain,
Deep darkness is all your clouded eyes can see,
But trust me when I say,
"There is a light somewhere.
This is just a maze of your own thoughts.
You will find a way out, you will find a way out."

The cold,
Still remains beside you,
You realize it'll never leave you,
The cold will always be there for you in your time of need,
Because the world is a cold place, whether you like it, or not.

My Love for you will never die

I`m thinking about what you said
And it makes me wish that I were dead
You only loved me when you were mine
But I`ll love you till the end of time
If you fall for someone else
It will make my life a living hell
My love for you will never die
Even if you aren't mine
And when you fall for me again
I`ll be hanging from a rope loving you while I`m dead.

Why so sad?

Venice is sinking.

No more will a gondola
ferry lovers huddled
below the gunnels,
trolling through the city
of romantic attachment

Where Casanova
plied his trade
most capably,
not just with words,
but with other acts
of lips and tongues

The millennia
of competent bridges
will allow passage
of liquid roads
above not below

Canals sluicing
in grand manner
across doorways
unwelcome, yet
accustomed to egress

Cobblestones
will spout green algae
unseen in murky
rising tides

A city reclaimed
by its element
of elegant decay,
and longtime lagoon dwellers
of architecture and artistry
will simply float away,
unanchored to
the wooden moorings
of home.

Today is a year
since last she left,
perhaps
it crossed my mind…
but,
Venice is sinking.

Letters to Ann Arbor

Is the ground still as cold and unforgiving
as it was the day they
laid you down?

Over here, the west coast rotates
in perpetual summer
and when it rains, we sizzle.

You learned that first hand
the day you tore into my life
and danced us both
into the arms of a sunburn.

I’d live it all again if I could manage the time skip.

-

I’m not sure if you remember
California sunshine,
but it remembers you.

The deep July heat calls your name.

Where'd you go?

-

The Monday before last
my fingers itched to paint beauty.

My palette was empty
so I walked to the store on Lighthouse Avenue,
spent hours contemplating shades
and still went home empty handed.

They don’t make colors like you anymore.

-

I dream of you and wonder.

Did your smile melt into mineral earth
or are you still a pretty face?
I look and find you only in ink and paper.
Are you gone from me forever?

When I die the world will silence my mouth with dirt
and my thoughts will retire
somewhere in between ash and stardust.

Maybe then I will find you.

The Death of Hope

I wish I never met you
I wish I never kissed you
And told you that I missed you.

I wish I didn’t write stupid poems
To try and convince you to be with me
I wish I wouldn’t stop by your house just because I could.

What are we doing here
You **** with boys’ minds
But why do you keep me around?

I wanted you
Now, I can’t even be in the same room with you
Just go.

Don’t talk to me
Don’t visit me
Just disappear

Leave my heart
Leave my soul
And everything about me as a whole.

Get me another drink
So I can wash your memory out of my veins
Kill some cells to leave this hell
It’s the only thing that helps.

I wish every star would explode and make me go deaf
And I wish the moon’s light would soon fade to black
So that I cannot see or hear
Maybe then I’ll forget the sound of your heartbeat under the night sky.

I wish I wasn’t so stupid
To stick around while you cried over some asshole who didn’t want you
I wish I didn’t care so ****ing much about your problems.

I wish I never told you how much I loved you
And all those times I spent comforting you...
Were just never quite enough.

Why you!
This was never supposed to be
Just stop caring and leave.

We go in circles anyway
Progress is an illusion for what resembles hope
I wish I could hurt you.
Scar you.
Quit you.
Leave you.

You never loved me…
Only my presence to help you forget your pain
Used me up, and now I have no pity left for you.

If you loved me, then you should have caught me when I fell for you
…For a whole year
Now my love for you is lying dead at the bottom of a dark trench.

I wish we never took so many pictures
Ones that I never should have taken
What were we thinking?

It took the death of hope to let you go
And now I finally know…

Stay cold and alone in your bed
Without the warmth of the blue jacket
Or the sweet aroma of my cologne

I hope you hurt just as much as I do
I hope your guilt eats you alive
And you grasp what was lost

I hope when your eyes visit the moon
You realize the distance back to your heart
And remember how far I loved you.

I wish I could forget you
And everything we ever had
Don’t you get it?

I don’t care about you.
I don’t care about your needs.
I don’t care about your feelings.
But I do.

Maybe one day our hearts will bring us back home
Right here to the place where we’d meet
Where hope and dreams walk hand in hand
Where reality meets actuality
Where love is the only thing that matters.
And where the death of hope becomes the birth of new possibilities.

A Funeral Of The Hearts

Monochromatic stains,
perpetual suffering.

There's no end in sight
to this everlasting blight.

Mountains of ash,
freshly scorched dreams.

Lead weighted,
sinks to dismal.

All doors close,
yet none seem to open.

Sit and wait,
Utterly isolated,

Reminiscing begins,
pleasant pictures of the past.

Things seemed so eternal,
magic frozen in time.

Foreshadowing life,
Mind looks toward the future

Hollow, in desolate sorrow,
grim future in sight.

Forlorn souls
become untwined

Love lost...
A funeral of the hearts

old Fashion, still

You broke your watch and you went still,
and the sidewalks weren't very gentle.
Stepped a little over ten pills
think that you might be going mental.
'Cause you think you are running away now
thinking you got away now
from those memories, in all of those nights
That's when things were all electric,
remembering why you weren't dead
And that's when it all whirled apart.

Never really ever had much,
Always wrote down in pencil,
But never ever erased still
'Cause you always had things memorized
from the day you were dreaming of it all
From last fall to the next winter,
Never really had anyone to call

Remember when things were read 'til?
Always thought you had some common nice class
when times were all getting feverish so fast
you thought they were all sentimental
but as the murks of all men steels,
Never notice how florescent they really were
Always thinking you never needed a cure.
But you never really bit, no,
Perhaps things would deal well

In your dreams, several of them remained
Never had you in featured at all
And did you know? Oh no.

Could you ever walk without heels?
Always grasping to the curb's vines
falling besides the Grey's mind
maybe you should not have used a pencil,
knowing that it could be fatal.
Lots in common with your night dress
always kept on top of paper watches
left alone with little tuxedos
Tearing up as some gentlemen left you.
Holding up this trivial crisis as you had long ago.

In your dreams, how many of those He-Man
ever held you in their free hands?
And didn't you wish, you could be one.
One of those, those who never let go.

If I, Should I?

If I climb starways to heaven, will I miss out the stars?
If I just lay right here, who's to stop the cars?
If I meet with your skin, who will see my scars?
Is this really my cage, when I can see no bars?

Should I take the first step, or should I sit and wait?
Should I turn towards, or quicken up my gait?
Should I question why, or accept it as my fate?
Is the time now right, or is it far too late?

Crying In A Corner.

Sitting here starring at a wall,
Waiting for the day that you call,
I want to talk to you,
Let alone be with you,
Sitting here in a corner can't you see,
All these tears aren't good for me


I would give up everything,
All of my dreams and my friends,
I would just enjoy being around you,
Not just for love,
I may love you,
And I know it isn't in return,
Now I'm crying here,
My heart starts to burn.


Roaring in flames,
Holes and knots in my heart,
Talking about broken hearts are menial,
For mine is a ball of strings.


These lies,
Cripple my heart,
These lies,
Stop me from feeling,
These lies,
Completely break me.


I was told to be happy,
I cannot with myself,
All alone,
My heart is turning to stone,
The marrow in my bones settle,
All of it is going down through the phone,
What the **** is up with this world,
My world...


My world of death,
All my friends and loved in a room,
They start to fall one by one,
What has my life become?
Holding a guitar tempted to strum,
To the beat my heart refuses to give,
But to turn the rest of me.


My heart and feelings no longer function,
It's all just one conjunction of lies and threats.
I want you and no-one else,
This is when I cling to myself,
But I have nothing to cling to...


"
Are you crying?"

Ozymandias

Ozymandias
my heroic fool.
You selfishly took my bullet.

You were my lover and my friend,
Ozymandias
If you only knew,
My whole world was you.

with every touch,
my heart raced,
I only wish i could have taken your place.

You loved me,
from the very start.
If only I'd known sooner,
our love could have lasted longer.

Our love was not meant to be,
so we were torn apart
with that shiny bullet,
through your heart.


What wrong did we do in this world,
other than to dare be different.
Our hearts beat like everyone elses,
so why do people think that they couldn't love and feel pain.
We're all the same,
though in our looks we range.

..Remember My Words...

Another day,
Another line.
You choose him,
time after time.

I'll write yet another,
poem about why I'm sad.
I'm so sick of it all,
I miss feeling glad.

I'm tired of writing,
these poems that never put me at ease.
If someone knows the way out of this heartache,
Don't hesistate to tell me, please.

People say "You'll be okay",
And smile right at you.
And your thinking," Yeah right,
you don't know what I'm going through".

Do you know what it's like to feel,
like you'll never feel happy?
Or what it's like to feel like you have to scratch your eyes out,
Just so you couldn't see?.

Even as I write these words,
my breath is filled with sighs.
Because they remind me of you,
so I slowly begin to cry.

It's not fair,
this feeling that's left me bare.
It's not fair that I'm still missing you,
and you don't even care.

You made that obvious,
when you let my world turn dark.
I stare lifelessy at everyone,
On my heart, you left a mark.

My poem is done,
my feelings have been told.
I hope you remember my words,
Til' the day you are grey and old...

oh crap a big mistake

im done with playing these games
you left me years ago without a sound
now you come back and beat my heart to the ground.
i thought you were an angel so perfect and sweet
but wait...that was your friend texting me
are you freaking kidding me?
youve destroyed me cant you see!
everything i worked for
the walls around my heart..
crubled right from the start.
so forget it...
im left in pieces..just like my heart.

White caps

Waves shatter
on your eyes,
the curve of your lips

salt
grazing cheeks

You
spill me onto the break
wash me away

I Can't Stop Crying Today

I can't stop crying today
My world walked out the door
With her she took my heart
For I will love no more

The hours passed like seconds
When our two hearts were one
The seconds passed like hours
After she said that she was done

She was going to love me forever
At least that is what she said
Her heart belonged to someone else
That is what her letter read

I no longer live in color
My world is black and white
I always wonder what she is doing
As I lie awake at night

I hope tomorrow is better
This is what I pray
But right now my heart is broken
I can't stop crying today

Wishful Thinking

Honey drops from your lips
Tears pour from my eyes
We are near each other
Yet I feel that we're far apart

I've been trying to reach your heaven
But I'm still stuck here on the ground
Fog covers the truth and blinded me
I gave up hopes of being found

Hey, can you even hear me?
Did you ever try to see
I guess I kept lying to myself
That somehow you'll love me

What is the thing that they call love
I thought it was fun and easy
I thought that paradise was within reach
But all turned out empty

When will I find that ever after
That ends happily
The prince that I thought you were
Turned out to be a shadow of a dream.

Don't go..

we almost died last night
you felt it as i did
the weight on our chest
crushing down and hating
words thrown around
no thought at all
just push down more
push away and drown
it is what we did
fight more and more
till we broke and fell

what was left of us then?
crawling into each others arms
feeling deaths grips pulling hard
we were welcoming it too
you and i, we didn't care
breaking each others hearts
was it worth it in the end
the tears streamed down
and our cries rang unheard
till we opened our ears
and voiced our feelings

welcoming each other back
our wounded hearts
will mend eventually
as long as we stop letting go
hang on tight and stay
that is all i ask baby
stay with me
hold onto me
grip tight baby
i'm holding you so tight
i don't want to let go
don't make me..

by kiraralee77

Honest pain

We sat falling
into each other,
a solemn collapsed moment
of utterances colored honest,
condemning the passive
as much as the aggressive.

I rested my chin
in the nape of your neck,
took shade beneath
your tilted head,
and let my whispers
crawl up your spine
until they tingled
all on their own.

“Did you ever love me?”
I have loved
and you were present.
I have loved
our time spent together.
I have loved
my own perspective,
of you,
but no…
I never did.

“Why would you lie?”
I love the truth;
and the touch
of its proven reality
enflames me,
I did not want
to share its caress.

“How could you do this?”
In the same way
I was able to achieve
anything in my life;
I applied myself
to those things
I wanted for most,
everything else
was simply a form
of necessary sustenance,
even your touch
served its purpose
at some point.

“Have you no heart? No soul?”
I listen to my heart,
I protect my soul,
both are aspects
of what you refer to
but could never touch,
hold,
or inspire,
just rest beside
for a portion
of temporal avowal.
I never promised
the forever that was mine
could include you.

“So this goodbye?”
I am already gone.


by Atavist

The Unsent Poem

Favorite song plays in the background
Every lyric reminding me of you
Conversations running through my head
So many things that I wish you knew

Everytime that you brought me happiness
I just never quite knew what to say
I was afraid to say the wrong thing
Thinking it would make you go away

Every night I did the same old thing
I wrote poem after poem on my bed
I love you written a hundred ways
Because of fear, they were never said

The stack of poems stands tall
Not one ever making it to you
You simply walked away from me
And a love that you never knew

If only I would have taken a chance
I know that you would still be here
At night I still write you many poems
Only now the ink is mixed with tears

Dusty Memories

I'll use his tears, as fuel
to spin my pendulumn-life
backwards
and
choke the crack from
his whispered screams
("I'm broken too")

That was the turning point:
when I realized
how selfish I was being;
I'd never loved
cared, or
hurt
as deeply
as that night-

he touched my nose and told me
he'd seen what he felt was
truth
in my eyes, but only
when I lied to myself.

I am
Macabre,

through the stench of failure across my skin
reminding me that
you're not as perfect as I think you are
(yet).

still he littered me in layers
with words I didn't hear; etched black
into my pores shallow enough
to break my wits and too deep
for me to rinse out;

I'm only breathing what
your fists pumped into my lungs

by FailedCondom

A BETTER TOMORROW

Author: Yvonne Warren
I never knew there would be a better tomorrow
But you've come into my life and taken away all my sorrow
My days of sadness are a thing of the past
Because I have found true love at last
My days of emptiness are gone for good
Because you fill a void in my heart that you should
You've opened a window
You've shown me the light
And my love for you will continue to burn bright.

ABBY Author: Clinton Followell

Every time we embrace,
I go to that far away place
When we just walk hand in hand.
I�m in never, never land.

Whenever I look into your eyes,
I begin to get butterflies,
Then my heart skips a beat,
And our lips passionately meet.

You are always on my mind,
Your face is all it can find.
I think about you every day
And know it�ll all work out some how, some way.

Some say we�re dumb and foolish
Some say we should do as we wish
But all my heart could ever do
Is tell you that I�ll always LOVE YOU.  

- William Shakespeare

"I loved you; even now I may confess,

Some embers of my love their fire retain,
But do not let it cause you more distress,
I do not want to sadden you again.
Hopeless and tonguetied, yet I loved you dearly
With pangs the jealous and the timid know;
So tenderly I loved you, so sincerely,
I pray God grant another love you so."

"The Broken Heart" - William Barnes

"News o' grief had overteaken
Dark-eyed Fanny, now vorseaken;
There she zot, wi' breast a-heaven,
While vrom zide to zide, wi' grieven,
Vell her head, wi' tears a-creepen
Down her cheaks, in bitter weepen.
There wer still the ribbon-bow
She tied avore her hour ov woe,
An' there wer still the hans that tied it
Hangen white,
Or wringen tight,
In ceare that drowned all ceare bezide it.

When a man, wi' heartless slighten,
Mid become a maiden's blighten,
He mid cearelessly vorseake her,
But must answer to her Meaker;
He mid slight, wi' selfish blindness,
All her deeds o' loven-kindness,
God wull waigh 'em wi' the slighten
That mid be her love's requiten;
He do look on each deceiver,
He do know
What weight o' woe
Do break the heart ov ev'ry griever.

"O Never say that I was false of heart,
Though absence seem'd my flame to qualify!
As easy might I from myself depart,
As from my soul, which in thy breast doth lie:
That is my home of love; if I have ranged,
Like him that travels I return again,

*****************************

Just to the time, not with the time exchanged,
So that myself bring water for my stain.
Never believe, though in my nature reign'd
All frailties that besiege all kinds of blood,
That it could so prepost'rously be stain'd,
To leave for nothing all thy sum of good:
...For nothing this wide Universe I call,
...Save thou, my Rose; in it thou art my all."

"Broken Heart"- Crystal Holtz

"I will never forget the days we once had

The days when you were everything to me
My mind used to tell me we'd be together forever
But now I realize that was all a big dream

The feelings I have for you will never go
I wish I could take back that one regretful day
The day when I willingly let you slide from my arms
Never did I think of the astonishing pain of regrets
That I would once have to live through
The sight of you in someone else's arms
Makes my heart shatter into a million pieces
I sometimes wonder if you still think of me
Or if to you, I'm just a face in the crowd
I wish so very much that one day we can have it all back
But for now, I'll sit here silently
Remembering all the memories we once shared
Everyday my love grows much stronger
Hoping that one day you will feel the same
And put back the pieces of my broken heart."

Walking alone

Walking alone is not difficult
But when we have
walked a mile with someone

Then coming back alone
that is more DIFFICULT..!! 

It's not when I look back

Its Not When I Look Back,
At All The Memories &
Good Times We Had,
Makes Me Sad,
Its When U Consider Those,
Memories As Nothing To you,
When They Meant,
Everything To Me.